I have a shaky relationship with religion. On one side, I see the need for it. I see why people need it, and heck, I was Wiccan when I was like seventeen, eighteen and nineteen. I even thought about going back to it, because the more atheism spreads, the more it becomes this…amalgamation of shitty Reddit opinions.
But I digress.
This is all less about religion and more about the supernatural. Not the television show that refuses to die and let go of the world—I mean actual people who refuse to let go of the world.
I don’t remember much of these types of things from my childhood but there were things in my teen years I can just barely fathom a memory of.
I used to live in a house with my father and his wife when I was in high school. Apparently this house was built atop a plot where an older house had burned down with a family of three inside.
I know. Sounds like a setup for a slasher flick or something. But I’m serious! I can remember things like feet moving around the carpet in my room at night, or a child singing softly in my closet as though they were trying to comfort themselves. I remember one of those old timey speakers that you’d stand up straight in your living room just randomly sliding across the floor.
Things flying off of shelves, objects ending up in places nobody actually moved them to.
Things I was told, like how one of them once woke up in the middle of the night with a man staring them in the face, screaming.
Now, they both deny these things actually happened, and maybe they didn’t. Maybe this was all a figment of my imagination. But it doesn’t stop there.
Later, in my early twenties, I moved in with a friend and I was there for years. And I remember this ghostly figure, this woman with gray skin, dark hair and she wouldn’t appear to me directly but I would catch a glimpse of her.
Sometimes outside when I was having a drink with my friends and we were bullshitting in the middle of the evening and there she’d be, standing around the edge of the garage just staring. Or tapping me on the shoulder while I’m sitting in front of the TV, or my computer, as if I couldn’t see her there.
The thing I find most strange about all of this is that none of it felt scary to me. It felt sometimes ominous, sometimes strange, but I was never terrified. Just, I would see this person who doesn’t exist in physical reality just…there.
And just as quickly, she’d be gone until the next time.
I don’t know who this is, or was, and I don’t know why they were there at the time, but I also don’t think she left my vicinity, even though I no longer live in that place.
At this point you’re probably thinking, “Damn, Meryl’s absolutely full of shit.” But I swear I’m not making any of this up. These things actually happened. Whether they were manifestations of my mind, or something that really happened in reality: I agree, that remains the question.
I never got a real clear look at this, we’ll call her, I dunno, ghost lady. And what I’m about to describe next might not even be the same person, or supernatural vision, whatever. But this happened just last year, in 2016.
It was just after dinner and you know, sometimes I get tired. I don’t have a lot of energy these days, as it’s literally been sucked out of me by everything. I was in bed just taking a nap as the sun was going down, lights off.
There was a dream. A woman, again, and I remember she was comforting me in this dream for some reason. Telling me something like, “It’s okay now. They’re all gone. None of them are left.”
I don’t know what those words meant in my dream, but I can tell you it didn’t feel like a good thing.
And she was real close to me. So close I snapped out of sleep, wide awake all of a sudden and in that waking moment, there was a woman standing over me at the side of my bed, in reality, staring down at me.
The most blank goddang look on her face and my only reaction was to get up on my knees, flip the light on and try to grab her. When the light came on she was still freaking there and as my arms wrapped around this figure that absolutely wasn’t physical—She ran. She ran until she passed, literally, right through wall.
I was awake.
Maybe not immediately, but I was definitely awake when I was bumbling around on my knees atop my bed and this person, this thing.
She was still there.
I wasn’t scared at first. I was more surprised, but about ten minutes later I was terrified. And for that entire week I could not sleep.
And ever since, I can’t sleep unless I feel safe.
Nothing has happened since then. and I’m glad, for the first time, that my “supernatural” experiences have come to a pause. Because I don’t know if I could handle that second time.
Are all of these experiences connected? Is someone following me through some otherworldly dimension? Is this a ghost? Some other being that isn’t even terrestrial? A faerie? Anything? A complete fabrication of my mind?
I don’t think I’ll ever know.